Things that shouldn’t be broken
girls who can run in heels should be feared
I am a very private person, yet I am an open book.
If you don’t ask…I won’t tell.
So I nanny for my neighbor and my family was in Boston so I stayed at her place and helped with the kids for the weekend because my parents didn’t want me staying home alone. And one day she wakes me up and says “do you want Taco Bell for breakfast?” And of course I’m like “THIS IS THE ONLY ACCEPTABLE WAY TO WAKE ME UP!” So we basically kidnap the kids from their beds because they were still sleeping and put them in the car, and we get there and she starts ordering and the guy says “excuse me mam the lunch menu isn’t ready yet” and she screams “WHAT THE FUCK?! YOU DIDNT HAVE A BREAKFAST MENU A COUPLE OF MONTHS AGO!!! I WANT A BURRITO FOR BREAKFAST DAMMIT!” So she pulls up to the window and gets grabs the waffle taco her son wanted and tosses it to the backseat at her son and looks at the guy and says “I swear if I had a bat I would walk in here and beat people until I got my fucking burrito. What time is the lunch menu?!” So he’s scared as shit and says “11” so she says “WE WILL BE BACK AT 11 AND YOU BETTER HAVE BURRITOS WHEN I COME BACK” and of course I’m in the passenger seat DYING, I think I laughed for 3 hours until we went back for the burritos. I kid you not she is my fucking spirit animal.
Someone send me pizza